determination, discipline and drive

this is what it takes to stay on a diet and exercise regime.

these words have never been used to describe me.

the closest descriptive word to the above used to describe me is stubborn.

ahhhhhhh…the yellow swimsuit…i loved that swimsuit. it had a textured yellow fabric. it really enhanced the tan and i loved the back. it had a big round opening with 3 different colored buttons that buttoned the top of the opening up to the back of the neck. 

this was the summer after 8th grade and we took our very first trip outside of texas and oklahoma. we went to visit some friends in la jolla, ca. i felt very awkward in that i was taller than everyone but my dad. my brother john (with the glasses) was only a year younger than me. i grew 3 inches that summer. i was 5’8” which is how tall i am now. it’s funny how i felt then, but now i look back and think i would love to be like that again (sigh).

this was a turning point in my life. i never obsessed with my weight or figure until then. this is where i begun hoping that i would be pretty and started thinking about my clothes. until then, i remember having favorite dresses that i would wear over and over again, but not really think that much about it. it was more fun just to worry about not being bored. after the summer of the yellow swimsuit, i would start obsessing about not having breasts, having very long and skinny arms (oh to have skinny arms!), and working on a smile like cheryl tiegs (i would never have her figure).

my dad is cleaning out the attic and has given me a box of my stuff. i have mixed feelings about it. i love looking at the old photos and cards that mom and dad have kept. i feel somewhat embarrassed about other things: my report cards (my course load wasn’t near what my children had in high school) and my letters to mom and dad from college are kinda’ funny & poignant, yet since i didn’t do well in school academically and it was not one of the happiest times of my life. although you would be able to tell if you read the letters.

and, look at my handprint! it says Ann 1960 which means i was 3 years old. what a wide chubby hand i had or should i say have. like my feet, i have very wide hands…not lebron james wide, but wide none the less.  

here is a sneak peek of why i must lose a bunch of weight. my stomach is HUGE. i am running with the wii program and it is boring. i am not a runner and here is where i would rank the wii running in place. from most fun to least: 1. not running at all, 2.running with a friend, 3.running on a track, 4.running on a treadmill and 5.running in place with wii. my son jason said he would run with me…well not WITH me exactly. we will be running at different speeds around the track. this will be way more fun than with wii. i am not saying that i don’t like wii fit…no…i love the step exercise.

these are my shoes. i do have some that are put away for the winter, but not a lot. my collection is colorful (i do have a row of black shoes above the grey row), but i do not have anything like jane and judy aldredge (click on shoes). i just cannot spend a lot of money on shoes. most of mine were on sale or very inexpensive (the most i’ve ever spent is about $120). i am too hard on my shoes. 

today, i cleaned out my closet for the warmer season. i promised michelle that i would not write depressing blogs, however, i must say that of all my clothes in here, i can wear 1 dress, some of my shirts & sweaters and all but 1 pair of shoes (sigh). i will be working on that. watch for tomorrow.

this is the other half of my closet and yes it is that small. 

Something different happened to me today. A man came up to me in the bookstore and told me that I was a very pretty lady and not only that, I have very pretty feet because I am wearing heels. And, not very women wear heels anymore.???????? I was pleased with the compliment, but why? I am not especially pretty and I am really overweight right now (just joined Weight Watchers today). And my shoes? Well they are a bit (okay…a lot) scuffed up and ordinary, and I am pleased to note that I have developed veiny old lady’s feet. Hunh!??? So, why? Why the complement? Was he hitting on me? Not likely. Did he truly mean the compliment? Or was it a new year’s resolution to say something nice to someone everyday and today it was my turn. This is the most likely answer, so now I need to pay it forward.

I love love love Jonathan Adler!!!

I love love love Jonathan Adler!!!

He is the ultimate in happiness. Read his musings!